Sausages and Lamb

Saturday afternoon came with blue skies, warm sunshine, as we all trooped out to A.... (Bristolian - qualified badger killer) house to host a celebratory party on the imminent departure of one of long serving village members S..... (Welsh - apparently suffers from random memory loss).

With strict instructions to be on time - 3.00pm - I duly complied along with the said S...., A..... (Welsh - long suffering spouse), his two children and young C..... ( English - would be beach bum).

The setting was perfect, and as was to be discovered later in the afternoon, the food was brilliant - but of course we had to start the proceeding off in traditional style - beers all round.

So with children ensconced in the swimming pool ( ok - plastic paddling pool !) and the men doing what men do best- drinking beer and talking absolute rubbish. However one gem did as ever emanated from the lips of V..... (Mexican/Latvian - holder of the key to useless information) - Apparently Water melons and Viagra have something in common - the both relax the muscles ! - So on this highest of authorities, a new medical break though for men, why waste money on the blue pill, when you can eat water melon and get the same result. For those of you in need, and try this out - let me know.

This was probably the largest gathering of village people in recent times, and I suspect that the rubbish bins will testify to the amount of beer, wine and food consumed - and to all of those of you could not make it, then Mr. S.... ( Welsh - with a shirt to die for ) - will still be around for a few more days yet. Regretfully the his cider consumption will be seriously curtailed as the village lounge is about to run out, indeed as I write it may well have run out !


Now speaking of consumption it would be fair to say that guest of honour did himself proud at the party,as was proven when later in the day he could not remember that he has telephoned for a taxi. He was quite convinced he had not, and his alcohol content had not influenced him one bit - me thinks not !

His little speech was how can say - Emotional - did I detect a little cry from the heart ?

So a day to remember, and I am sure tales from it will be told for a long time to come - however the time is not quite come to say farewell. To A.... (Bristolian - Barbecue King) and his good Lady Y...... (Latvian - hostess with mostest) - huge thanks from us all for hosting a great party !!

For those Irish readers you will be delighted to know that P..... (Irish - soon to be Gaddafi sidekick) - he did on this occasion to consume a few more beers and wine than usual, even if he was the only one to be drinking beer from a glass.

Oh - and the sausages and Lamp chops were illegally imported all the way from Wales, but I will for the sake of the guilty party(s) not publish details of this highly organised sausage/lamb smuggling ring gang members.

However at the party the culprits were caught on camera, and certainly they do have the hardened look of meat smugglers - so watch out next time you are travelling - they could be sitting right next to you !